Shocking: Santa Vanishes in Explosive Action Drama ‘Red One’ – Will He Be Found?

“Red One” crashes midflight

In the midst of “Red One,” the holiday-themed action-comedy featuring Dwayne Johnson and Chris Evans, there’s a scene where the film self-destructs. When does it happen? During a ridiculous slap contest on Krampusnacht, an alternate St. Nicholas Day celebration. In this scene, extras donned in rubber monster masks, seemingly borrowed from the set of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” watch as Dwayne Johnson and a barely recognizable Kristofer Hivju (the “Game of Thrones” actor portraying Krampus) take turns slapping each other. The film’s momentum comes to a screeching halt, and any previous absurdities are quickly forgotten, buried under a wave of horrendous special effects. The remainder of the movie limps towards the finish line, although, truthfully, it was never particularly agile to begin with.

A muscular Christmas

Despite its flaws, “Red One” is certainly robust. The film, with a story by Hiram Garcia (Johnson’s ex-brother-in-law and co-producer), poses an intriguing question: What if Santa Claus was buff? J.K. Simmons plays the role of the muscular St. Nick, a beefed-up version of Father Christmas. Every other Christmas element is similarly enhanced: the snowmen, the polar bears, and even the elves. In this case, the elves are the E.L.F. (Enforcement, Logistics, Fortitude), Santa’s security team, led by Callum Drift (Johnson), dressed in festive red and green leathers.

Callum has been protecting Santa for centuries, and just as he is about to retire, Santa is kidnapped from the North Pole by a mysterious high-tech group. Callum’s only hope to find Santa is to join forces with a mercenary hacker, Jack O’Malley (Chris Evans), who located Santa’s workshop. Jack, a skeptical non-believer, provides the comic relief with his sarcastic remarks.

Lack of chemistry

Directed by Jake Kasdan and written by Chris Morgan, “Red One” attempts to be an unconventional buddy comedy. The film is riddled with Christmas puns and peculiar creatures (the sight of a massive, muscular snowman reattaching his upper body to his legs is nightmare-inducing). Regrettably, Johnson and Evans share limited on-screen chemistry.

Johnson, typically a charismatic presence, shines when he’s playing tough characters (as seen in the “Fast and Furious” franchise) or when he’s playing against type (“Jumanji,” “Central Intelligence”). In “Red One,” he’s somewhat caught in-between. Callum is a tough guy, but he’s also otherworldly. His literal interpretation of Jack’s sarcastic comments, meant to be humorous, fall flat. Johnson and Evans never quite gel, and while Evans’ Boston-accented lovable rogue act is predictable, Johnson feels lost, failing to settle on a consistent tone.

Unpleasant surprises

However, focusing on these slight missteps feels trivial when everything else in the movie is so abysmal. The humor misses the mark, the action scenes are shockingly bad (no offense to the undoubtedly overworked VFX artists), and none of the star-studded cast seems to be enjoying themselves. Simmons’ role is barely more than a cameo, as he spends most of the film asleep in a fishbowl, held captive by Kiernan Shipka’s “Christmas witch” Gryla. Lucy Liu manages to convincingly portray the strict head of the organization overseeing mythical beings and creatures. The film attempts to emulate a holiday-themed “Mission: Impossible” or “Jason Bourne,” an idea that is mildly amusing for a brief moment.

In conclusion, “Red One” is a baffling attempt at appealing to all audiences – it seems to target children, but its content leans more towards adults – and falls flat on all fronts. The highlight is when Jack, played by Evans, tries to explain the convoluted plot to his son in a hilariously blunt and straightforward way. It’s time to take these Christmas cookies out of the oven, because “Red One” is decidedly overbaked.

This review was written by Katie Walsh, a film critic for the Tribune News Service.